Monday Smile: Travel terms

Old-world charm – room with no TV, radio and only one light.
Tropical - rainy.
Majestic setting - A long way from town, at end of dirt road.
Options galore - nothing is included in the price.
Secluded hideaway - directions to locate unclear.
Some budget rooms - sorry, already occupied.
Explore on your own - at your own expense.
Minutes from - by plane.
Romantic - no phone in room.
Knowledgeable trip hosts - they've flown in an airplane before.
No extra fees - no extras available.
Bird watchers’ paradise - your car's paint will never be the same.
Nominal fee - outrageous charge.
Standard - sub-standard.
Deluxe - barely standard.
Superior accommodations - one complimentary chocolate, free shower cap.
All the amenities - two chocolates, two shower caps. Just like home - no maid service.
Plush - both top and bottom sheets, bed shakes.
Gentle breezes - in hurricane alley.
Light and airy - no air-conditioning.
Picturesque - theme park nearby.
24-hour bar - ice cubes at additional cost (when available).